Why you should relax – do it!

I have recently been suffering with a very painful back, shoulders and neck due to the chair at work not giving me the support I need. However, I decided to visit my local beautician for an Indian Head Massage. I have had one of these before and I felt so much better afterwards, my head was clear, the knots in my back had gone and my mood lifted. With the impressive results last time I thought that it might help me this time and my word it really did.

What is an Indian Head Massage?

Well I can’t give you an actual definition because I don’t know the meaning. Jasmine, my beautician from Beauty at Pelo, Swadlincote only charges a bargain price of £25 for one hour and fifteen minutes of absolute heaven. Your shoulders, back and neck are lightly covered in an oil to soften the skin. There is a lot of thumb and arm work involved during the massage. Today I could feel the knots crunching and I had so many of them – no wonder I was in pain. You should have seen the smile on my face as they were being demolished! Plus, I had relaxation music on in the background so I got to completely switch off from the world, it was wonderful.

The session then moves onto your head and face. AHH I love my hair being played with, love it love it love it. This is another reason I choose to have an Indian Head Massage because your whole scalp is massaged and then she moves onto circular techniques on your face (if you suffer with migraines, give this a go).

I never want it to end, I honestly cannot say how better I feel, I have a clear mind, my back, neck and shoulders are no longer in pain and I’m in a great mood! If you have a beautician please consider this if the option is available. I just want to say a big thank you to Jasmine for being such a lovely lady, she’s really helped me today.


My invisible illness means I am just fine

I have written a post before about my Joint Hypermobility and how everyone is extremely judgemental when it comes to a young person sitting down on public transport without considering others. Wait, no that is not the case. You have no idea that I could be needing this seat and to be honest I do not need to justify myself to anyone. Readers thoughts ‘Oh God she’s off ranting again.’ YES I FRICKEN AM!

As you know I have had to take on a Christmas Temp job in retail because no bloody soul will give me a nice office job. Thing is, it is making me ill again and I have no motivation to do anything else because I am physically exhausted – YAY thanks Fibromyalgia you bitch. STOP telling me working in retail is easy because 1) it is not, I have to put up with people speaking to me like dirt 2) I work unnecessariliy over the Christmas period so people can buy ‘bargains’ – don’t do this please and 3) everyday takes its toll on my joints despite what I might be doing.

For example, yesterday I worked 09:30 – 17:30 which is a normal day, not too long and I have done this many times before. However, for some reason my body decided to hate me and cause me to be in that much pain I needed to take Codeine but I forced myself to not go down the painkiller route. I hobble around, I shut myself down because my mood is incredibly low and people will think it is because of them but it really isn’t. This is where the Fibro kicks in, I am that drained I can’t concentrate and make little mistakes. I forget how to spell, I forget what I am doing, previously forgotten how to say certain words and my eyes feel constantly blury when I look around. You might say ‘Oh you’re just tired, put your feet up and get an early night.’ Yeah okay I’ll take your advice and see how it doesn’t cure me. Never thought of that before.

Today I feel awful hence why I am writing this blog post as I can’t cope with people saying I have it easy and that my job is a ‘piece of piss’. Yeah it might be and I enjoy my job even though I am looking for an alternative but why should I go out, work my ass off to come home and be ill when so many people can work and just can’t be arsed to get off their backside so they claim. <– Ah sorry for the long sentence. Ergh, I am not entitled to any sort of PIP because I’m not severe enough but I still go to bloody work.

Point of this post is, I am angry people are telling me I’ll be fine or yeah just apply for anything cos it’ll be better than what you’re doing now. I don’t think so, my manager is so understanding and whilst I am looking for a Social Media / Marketing Assistant job I am still scared that an office job will tire me out. Just watch what you’re saying before making assumptions please.

I want to work at home doing what I love, that’s all I want.

You’re just double jointed so get over it

Why did I choose this title you might be asking? Well I am not ‘just double jointed’. One thing I need to say, you have no idea of the daily struggles of living with an invisible illness. People often stare at one another, on the train, on the bus, in a queue but no one actually knows if that person is okay just because they’re able-bodied. Welcome to judgemental life.

Will you tell us what is wrong?

Of course, I suffer with Joint Hypermobility Syndrome which is a connective tissue disorder as well as Fibromyalgia. It affects people differently, in my case I am fairly lucky to not have a severe form but I still have to adapt to certain things. For me, being tired is the worst pain of all because I’m not tired, I am physically and mentally exhausted and a nap doesn’t fix the problem. Sleeping for hours and hours helps but then I wake up and within three hours I feel I need to sleep again. It is like a reoccurring nightmare.

1) Career

Oh it is easy to get a job, there are so many jobs out there – I hear this ALL of the time. Yes I know there are jobs out there but I can’t just waltz into a job like a completely healthy person, I need to choose carefully. It might seem daft but even working in retail and hospitality causes me grief. Working on my feet all day is a disaster, the pain is awful and the swollen ankles tops it off. ‘Oh just take some painkillers.’ – No because that is not the answer. The answer is to have a job you believe in, you want to do and one that does not cause you physical damage. The doctors told me I needed to consider changing my career path (when I was 18) as I will cause myself lasting damage. Self-employment has always been advised to me by doctors but it isn’t guaranteed income which is something I need to figure out and plan.

When I was working in hospitality I spent a lot of the time hiding my pain behind a fake smile. Home time was my favourite part of the night, I would get to go home in agony, crawl into bed and cry. It felt fantastic. It also made me feel extremely low about myself because I was incapable of doing my job. I often cried at work, my colleagues would find me washing up or trying to pour a pint whilst crying. Shame and embarrassment was a common feeling for me and I had to quit my job for something more suitable. From then on, I have stuck to office work.

2) Outings

The worse topic for me. Planning an outing is difficult whether it is with friends or my boyfriend, I always have to be considered. When people tell you they would love to go ice skating, roller blading or for a night out, my mood instantly drops. Ice skating is my worst fear because it feels like my ankles are on fire and I feel guilty for having to sit down or hide the fact I want to burst into tears. The guilt that goes through your head at each outings you go to makes you fear the next one. I have ruined many nights out with friends because my ankle has collapsed and I have needed to go to A&E and they’ve had to come with me. Then there’s the ‘Guys I’m really suffering *sniff* I need to sit down or go home.’ – Oh I dread that phrase and I’m sure my friends do as well. SORRY GUYS, I LOVE YOU!!

3) Day to-day

Each day is different for me, sometimes I am suffering and other days I can be as happy as a lamb jumping through a field. Today is a bad day, my back is sore and my ankles are because I have over done it with housework – I know, call the excitement police. Most days I just want to sleep and be left alone because my moods are all over the place. I probably should have a WARNING sign attached to my head when I’m having a bad day. I appreciate it when people ask if I’m okay or if I need time on my own as I don’t need to explain myself nor snap at anyone. Thank you!

4) When winter is coming

Ah, every joint, Arthritic and Raynaud sufferers worst nightmare. The cold really aggravates sore joints and makes you want to hibernate for the entire winter. However, I do love winter, I love the scenery, the fact I can sleep at night and use a hot water bottle if needs be and it is my favourite season. I love the fact I can choose my temperature and keep myself warm.

As much as I would like to, I can’t speak for everyone who has been diagnosed with Hypermobility Syndrome but we are not the same people. I want to raise more awareness about this condition and this is one of the reasons I wrote this post. It is important to show that other things exist and to help educate.

This little keyring is something that I adore because I do not have to explain anything to anyone if I have an accident. It is there, it does not say what it means but at least if I am unconscious people can ‘Google’ if they need to and find out what the condition is. Thank you to Memories Enclosed who made this.


Medical Alert Keyring

So I am not ‘just double jointed’ it is something a bit more serious than doing fancy party tricks and putting on a show. Yes I am able-bodied but you have no right to judge anyone and take a minute to think about others. If you see someone who is screwing up their face or gripping onto anything they can whilst on public transport maybe ask yourself one question ‘Should I see if they would like my seat?’.

Just three weeks to go until the big 10k

In January I decided to take on the challenge of doing a 10K run for Race for Life during the summer. Well the date is approaching, I only have three weeks left which feels a bit surreal because I will admit that I’m not ready for it. I mean I can walk that but run? Pfft no. I have been training and changing things though just to prepare me for the race however being an asthmatic and having Joint Hypermobility Syndrome makes things a little difficult. My aim is to run though so I will try and prove my body wrong!!!

35127_1487679945703_863489_nThis was me 6 years ago doing Race for Life with Rachel.

I love that picture, it shows how great it was to do Race for Life and to be honest it also saddens me as I was so slim back then (okay not so slim but a hell of a lot slimmer). I look back at this and it pushes me to carry on and not give up on something I want to do. It also lets me appreciate the trainers I have now, those ones are horrendous.

If anybody would like to sponsor me, even if it is just £1 as every £1 will help save a life then I have popped the link below. I would be over the moon as I’m just £45 away from reaching £300 which will be £100 over my target.

Race for Life donation page

Thank you xxx

Bootcamp has finished

For the past four weeks I have attended a fitness bootcamp which I thought would be a good idea. It was, however my joints have really suffered whilst taking part. The next morning is never fun either, the walking around limping, the groans and the tiredness is something I can’t deal with. Yay for Joint Hypermobility Syndrome.

I am pleased I finished it but right now, I feel really tired and exhausted but bring on Zumba on Friday evening! I am determined to keep it all up at the gym and I am also going to help a friend get fitter as well.